Old Person's Olympics

Makaria and I are in Guangzhou, taking care of her visa stuff. I'll try and keep this positive and light, which is a contrast to the experience we have had working with US gov't offices. The cool thing about this city is that it's a main portal for Americans picking up their babies from China to bring home through adoption. I've gotten to meet some wonderful families and hear some incredible testimonies. Another fun thing about this city is that there is color here. As in lots of different nationalities. It's like a buffet of color. I love it. I spent some time looking through gorgeous African cloth this afternoon and dreamed of all the things I could make with them.

This morning, we had a little time on our hands, so we gallivanted off to a park. This is pretty much what Makaria looked like for a decent portion of our stroll. She laughed and said hi and shook hands and lifted up her shirt for all to see.



This is the first time I've gotten to do bubbles with her. I love 'first time' things with your kids. What a blessing.



Then we got to eat Turkish food. I love Turkish food. I do not love the hair on the arms of Turkish men.




I will tell you, that if there was such thing as an Old Person's Olympics, China would take the entire Western hemisphere to school. One of the things I love about China is watching the older people do their hobbies. They are always outside doing something. Playing cards, carrying around their grand kids, beating their legs on a tree, kicking around a hacky sack, walking backwards, hitting a badminton birdie, the list could go on and on. I've finally decided to capture some of it in pictures.





In this picture alone, there's a squatting man, a woman dancing with a plastic ring, a woman using the bridge to stretch, and a woman doing Tai Chi.




This is not your family reunion type of badminton. These people sweat playing it.



Now, this man with the jacket. He was initially walking around in circles clapping. He then realized that Makaria was sleeping and so decided for a quieter form of exercise. (This might have been a decision hastened by the fact that I shot him an evil eye.) So he removed his jacket. And started running in circles. And then twirling the jacket around like Julie Andrews.




This is one of my favorite exercises to watch. They all have a small racket with a ball on top. Then, there is music that is played and a routine that is danced. They twirl around, moving the racquets in a very fluid motion so that the ball doesn't fall. It's really amazing to watch. They put it behind their backs and through their legs and spin around. Amazing. And Makaria thought so too.

Noel Piper's thoughts

As I weep over the orphan crisis in Haiti, a friend reminded me of Noel Piper's blog. She's got a lot of resources if you are wanting to help or find out more information. And it's also just a really great blog. We've followed her thoughts on trans-racial adoption and have appreciated her Biblical approach to the whole thing.

Haiti and adoption and my weird dream

Everything that has happened in Haiti has raised emotions of every type. Anger, sadness, fear, shock. I've honestly not wanted to blog about the earthquake. I'm not sure why. Sometimes I feel like things are best left unspoken. There's just too much to process in an event like this.

There are tons of charities to give to. But I know that Compassion International has been in Haiti for a long time, ministering to families and orphans. They have embedded themselves in the community and have been a respected Christian organization for some time. But it really seems as if people are informed on where to send their money now.

It's been interesting for me, because the thing that has hit me most in all of this is the orphan crisis. Haiti already has a large percentage (I've read over a million orphans existed in Haiti....before the earthquake) of orphans. After this earthquake, not only will the number of orphans increase, but children already promised to adoptive families have died. As we were going through our adoption process, the second we got a referral picture of Makaria, our family changed. Once you have a picture of your child in your minds, you start to envision their personalities, dream about what will make them laugh, quiz your other children on what it will be like once she gets home. This dream has been shattered for so many parents.

I realize that this is a weird take on the whole thing. My heart aches deeply for all the communities that have been destroyed. But I've also found my heart aching deeply for the orphans and their soon to be families. We read a story of a family that received a new picture of their son and their orphanage that is now based out on a street. I cannot imagine the sadness this would bring for a family.

I had a dream last night where Matt Chandler (I know, that's rather random) and some friends asked me about our adoption journey. As I started to explain, I sobbed uncontrollably, out of joy. The joy in the adoption process, the rejoicing over our email inbox that showed us our new daughter, the worshipping that happened when we held her for the first time. It is overwhelming even now. Anyway, I woke up the next morning and my eyes were puffy and watery. I had actually cried in my sleep. I was overwhelmed in my dreams and my reality.

All of this rambling is to say that if you are contemplating adoption, I want to encourage you to take the plunge. Trust God with the details. Kids, like these in Haiti, aren't getting any younger. The window is small to be able to adopt. Meaning, that these kids will grow up. Make that phone call to agencies today. Do the research today. Pray today.

Children are waiting....and so is insurmountable joy for you and your family.

Is the God of the Missional Gospel Too Small?

Here is a fantastic corrective to a tendency among "missional" churches.

The article, "Is the God of the Missional Gospel Too Small?" comes from a ministry called "9Marks", which is solid in every respect (led by Mark Dever).

Malachi's 6th

Today is my not-so-little-anymore-guy's birthday! He's 6 today. The above picture is us at a barbecue type of thing, where they bring around skewers of meat. I've blogged about it before, but they have things like cow's tongue and chicken hearts and pizza made with cheese and bananas. There's also a huge buffet with noodles, salads, fruit and tons of other various sides. Malachi wanted to go there for his birthday dinner, so we packed up the gang and headed out.




Makaria entertained the masses, while we scavaged for edible meat. We really did have a good time. I think the older 3 kids went up to the buffet at least 8 or 9 times a piece. They were just beyond themselves. It was really fun watching Malachi soak it all in. He's a kid that feels and lives deeply. The waiters, the new foods, the shiny deserts. They all were very intriguing to him. I think he sampled one of everything on the buffet line.



Then tonight we had a family dinner at home and ate the Oreo ice cream pie and opened a few gifts. We did our traditional going around the table and naming things that we love about Malachi. He's really grown up a lot this year. He's very concerned about taking care of the poor, about protecting his brother and sisters (he started Tai Kwan Do this year, so if he sees a potential coflict, he tells us not to worry and that he'll just Kong Fu Panda them) , and making sure that justice prevails. He and I (Carrie), had a little lunch date a few days ago and we had the best time. He asked me some really great questions and we just chatted like old friends. It was wonderful. I love that little guy.



We had a great time together. He's growing up way too fast. I cannot wait to see what the Lord does with him as he continues to grow. We love you, buddy!

"Make a Life, Not a Living"

To all who long to perceive and be a part of God's significant work around the world, Samuel Zwemer, one of the pioneer workers among Muslims in the Middle East, wrote a brief article called "The Glory of the Impossible". Enjoy!

today I saw... and a funny adoption story

This is what my kids looked like as they got ready for bed. We don't really do pajamas in our house. I dunno, I can't seem to keep the pajama world organized, so I just deny it exists. Henceforth, we get this:




On a funny adoption note, I wanted to share what is probably my favorite comment yet. Our family and a friend were waiting at a tv station for Selah's dance performance to begin (you can rest assured that there will be a blog on this in the very near future.). So of course we acted as the opening act as all the families waited in the lobby. Pretty much everyone just stares, takes pictures of us and asks us funny questions. Our friend was holding Makaria, when she got asked this question: "So, as the baby (Makaria) gets older, will she get whiter and whiter? You know, to match the rest of her family." My friend was laughing really hard when she called me over to tell me the story. My first thought was: "She's a baby, not a chameleon!"

Brit Hume and Evangelism

From the Gospel Coalition blog:

The furor surrounding Brit Hume’s encouragement to Tiger Woods to convert to Christianity shows us that the prevailing sentiment of our culture is adamantly opposed to the idea of evangelism.

As Christians, we must recognize that before we can make a robust defense for the Christian faith, we may have to clear the air by making a case for evangelism in general. After having listened to some of the remarks made about Brit Hume, I have compiled a list of common objections to “proselytism” and why each of them are unpersuasive.

Objection #1: “Brit Hume’s remarks indicate that he thinks Christianity is superior to Buddhism.”

Response: Of course, he thinks Christianity is superior. Otherwise why would he remain an adherent to the Christian faith?

In the same way, I would expect a Buddhist man to think that his religion to be superior to Christianity. If the Buddhist doesn’t consider Buddhism to be superior, then why not convert to whatever religion he thinks issuperior?

It is not arrogant to believe that your religion is superior to others. We should assume that religious people believe their faith to be superior.

Furthermore, if you believe no religion is superior to another, you are putting forth a viewpoint that you believe to be superior than the “religious superiority argument” you condemn. Thus, you fail to live up to your own demand.

Objection #2: “Christianity looks bad when Christians talk this way. Christians should not publicly and actively proselytize people of other faiths.”

Response: If Jesus calls us to make disciples of all nations and to preach the gospel, then Jesus is calling us to evangelism/proselytism. The issue is not about the way Christianity looks before the world. The question is whether or not someone can be a faithful follower of Jesus Christ and not evangelize.

To the person who says, “It’s arrogant to proselytize”, I say, “I consider it more arrogant that you think I should followyou in this area rather than Jesus Christ, who I claim as Savior and Lord.” It is the height of arrogance (and prejudice) to tell a Christian, “You should not follow Jesus Christ in this area.”

Objection #3: “Brit Hume implied that Buddhism is deficient in some way.”

Response: The assumption behind this objection is that all religions are equally valid. But that assumption is not so easily proven.

Do we really want to argue that no religion has any deficiency? That every religion is equally good (albeit in its own way)? Such a view is very disrespectful to the adherents of other religions. Buddhists know that they are not Christians. Christians know that they are not Muslims. By assuming that every religion is equally valid and good, you are downplaying the significant differences between these faiths.

Don’t patronize people and act like their differing views don’t matter. They do. They know they do. We know they do. Let’s agree on the fact that there are substantial disagreements and leave aside this nonsense that we all believe the same thing.

Objection #4: It is arrogant for Brit Hume to assume he believes in the only true religion and to try to lead people to the Christian faith.

Response: Is it? Most people in the world today do not believe that all religions are equally valid. In fact, most people believe that their religion is the correct one.

So by saying that it’s arrogant to insist your religion is right… well, that’s an arrogant statement too. You’re telling me that the majority of the world is wrong and you are right. Sounds oppressive. It’s also ethnocentric and prejudiced to believe that we in the enlightened West have figured out that all religions are the same and the poor, mindless Christians, or Muslims, or Hindus, or Buddhists across the world are still in the dark, thinking they have the only light.

Objection #5: Brit Hume’s attempt to evangelize Tiger Woods shows how exclusive and narrow-minded fundamentalist Christians are.

Response: Actually, no. True evangelism takes place because the call of salvation is radically inclusive. We are to call all people everywhere to repentance and faith: people from every tongue, tribe, and nation; people of every color, ethnicity, and background; yes, even people who claim other religious identities.

The truly narrow-minded, prejudiced Christian looks at a Buddhist like Tiger Woods and stays quiet about Jesus. Their silence says this: Jesus isn’t for you.

On the other hand, the evangelistic Christian recognizes the radically inclusive call to salvation. It is because of the exclusive nature of Christianity that the offer of the gospel is so radically inclusive. Christ calls all people everywhere to repentance. Forgiveness in Jesus Christ is available for all… even Buddhists like Tiger Woods.

Effectiveness vs Efficiency

Two things everyone wants in their work and ministry: effectiveness and efficiency. Americans take pride in being efficient, but many people might not know how to distinguish the two words. Here are two possible definitions that we are finding helpful.

"doing right things" (effectiveness)
"doing things right" (efficiency)

Who cares if we are efficient as being ineffective? When do you consistently evaluate if what you are doing in your family, job, or ministry is most effective?

This requires distinguished between what is good and what is best. Satan rarely tempts us with blatantly 'evil' things. It's usual 'good' things that stop us from the best. We hear them in arguments when people say, "It's not bad!" or "This is a good thing." This requires Biblical saturated minds that seek the wisdom of God hourly.

A Genuine Question

A Genuine Question for Arminians (from Justin Taylor's blog)

I’m not so much interested in a debate, but for those readers who are Arminian (welcome, by the way; I’m glad you’re here), how do you understand a passage like Genesis 20:6, where God tells Abimelech “I . . . kept you from sinning against me” and “I did not let you touch her”?

If God can prevent the action of this king, was the king’s choice free?

And if God can do this for the king, can he and does he do it for others?

THE photo shoot

About two weeks ago, I heard a knock at the door. It was my friend who has been stalking me for about 6 months now. She works at a modeling agency in our same building and has been wanting to take pictures of our kids for a long time. I've done the "I'm really busy right now." and the "I need to talk to my husband first." Seriously, I've run into this girl at the store, on the street, the elevator, and then staring me face to face at my front door. When she came in, I told her I was busy at the moment and she said "you've been busy for 6 months already!" So I told her that I needed to talk with my husband first. She replied "you've had 6 months to talk to your husband!"

I was stuck.

I knew I was going to need to do this photo shoot. So, we wrapped up home school with Selah and I took her and Makaria up to the 19th floor to see what was in store for us. I didn't know any specifics, just that she wanted us to come upstairs and take pictures for free that we could keep.



We walked in and she told me that next time we should wear more fashionable clothing. "Oh," I thought, "you have no idea what kind of clientele you've got on your hands here." They wanted me to take some pictures, but modeling is just not my thing. And I'll tell you that my 8 year old was a little too good at it for her mom's liking. The lady asked me if I had taught her these moves that Selah was giving the camera. And if you know me at all, the question will make you snicker. Teaching my 8 year old how to model just didn't make the home schooling cut. All of these are her own home grown moves.

There are a few more pictures with me in them, but I'm not posting them. Nope...just not gonna post them.

Listening

Listening is not simply, or mainly, hearing what the other person is saying. It is thinking about what they are saying, and doing so from their point of view.

Implication: This includes a willingness to be influenced by others. If you are generally unaffected by what other people say, you aren’t listening.

(from What's Best Next blog)

Arbitrary Parent Rule #8, #9

These were directed towards my 3 year old.

8. You may not stick blue pencils in the cornbread.

9. You are not allowed to stick rolls in your armpits.

The Quest for Relevance

Today, people talk a lot about relevance.

What one needs is far more relevant than what one wants.

Let this simple thought protect us from compromising our preaching and practice, from church hopping, relationship fickleness, and the emotional fragility that plagues us as modern Christians.

Fundazzle

I love this picture because it's filled with unfiltered joy. There's not a worry or concern in his body. I pray on a daily basis for this type of attitude. And I will tell you that this is not my natural disposition. For whatever reason, I lean towards cynicism and lack of joy. If the Lord had not changed my heart, I can't imagine the sarcasm and melancholy that would flow freely from my pores. Anyway back to our week.

We had to head into town for dental and medical appointments and do a few things regarding Makaria's immigrant visa. For some reason, God has decided to deal our famiy the 'do things the hard way' card. So He called us to adopt while living in China. This has added more hurdles to the adoption process than I can even explain and more than you care to read about. A simple trip to the clinic to get her medicals has turned into a two week, multiple trips to Beijing type of event. But, first we stopped at a place called Fundazzle. It's a HUGE indoor play place. What kid wouldn't love that ball pit?!

Did I mention that no taxi drivers will take our entire family now? We can still flag a taxi if half of us wait by the curb and get in the taxi. Once in, the rest of the crew ambushes the car and slams the door shut before the driver knows what hit him. Then we just shout directions at the driver and he takes off with his head in a frenzy.

We tried having pizza...closed. We tried having Ethiopian food...closed. If you've never been to China, you would not believe the amount of stores that open and close in any given month.

I definately didn't bring my 'A' game on this trip. I forgot important documents, tried to take our family to places that no longer existed and then left my immunizations on the window ledge at our hostel. (I realize that sounded weird as I typed it. Many times, we just buy our vaccinations and bring them back and have a nurse/friend inject the vaccine. I was trying to keep mine cold by putting it by the window.)

But, we made it. This is how the girls and I spent New Year's Eve. Now we are home, doing laundry and catching up. By the way, 2010 is going to be a year of joy for us. That's going to be my prayer and focus for the year....the entire year....not just January 1-5. (That's about how long my Trapper Keepers stayed organized while in school too. For the first week, I was organized and tidy. After that, it was over. I'm going to try and make it all year long this time.)

today i saw...

A jewelry store grand opening.

Of course the kids found the way to the drums.

Don't you wish all store openings were accompanied by dancing dragons and old women playing drums?

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

For all of you that are hoping for a white Christmas, be careful what you wish for. We have had a white winter wonderland everyday of the week. If I close my eyes and pretend real hard, I can tell myself that the white outside is not pollution frollicking through the air, but indeed a nice blanket of white snow keeping us cozy for the holidays.



On a fun note, here are the packages that a 4th grade Sunday school class from the States sent us for Christmas! It looks like the pacakages limped their way to our home, but they made it. We were instructed to open two of them on Christmas day. We are all really excited!


On other fun news, Hubs and I celebrated 11 wonderful years of marriage. Brad and I were joking that morning that it's been the best 9 years of our lives. The first couple of years were a little rough. But honestly, marriage only gets better the longer you're married. We such a great time navigating life together. He surprised me with my favorite dinner-hot pot.

Then we headed over to an acrobat show that a friend gave us tickets for.

It was a beautiful theater.



As I look over our year, it seemed that some of these acrobat pictures very aptly described our year. We will call this picture, "Transition." We picked up our daughter from Ethiopia and moved cities all in the same week. This picture is exactly how we felt for the months of July, August and September.


We affectionately refer to this picture as "Parenting." We've now got an 8, 5, 3, 2, and 1 year old. And many days, I feel like the two women upside down and still keeping the plates spinning. Except that my toes aren't pointed and half my plates have been strewn across the floor. While it's been crazy transitioning to our new family make-up, it's been wonderful in too many ways to describe.


This picture is titled, "Legs: God's solution to the environmental problems". If we would all just ride like this to work, the ozone would be just fine.

This is what we feel like as a family when we go to the store. Usually not only are we carrying ourselves, but usually several grandmas and onlookers follow us through the store as well. As long as we end up back at home with the same number of people we had when we left, we consider the trip a success.


I could blog all day about the amazing blessings the Lord has given to us. Most of all, for the trials. There have been a few trials this year, but all of them for our good. All of them ordained by the Lord.

My Selah girl finished her first knit scarf a couple of days ago. It's beautiful! She's going to give it to her sister for Christmas.

So there's the Cliff Notes version of our year. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all!

By the way, if you are used to getting weekly updates from us, you haven't gotten one this week because Brad's computer is a PC which is the acronym for Piece of C---. :)

The Issue of 'Santa Claus'

The following is from Noel Piper:

Over the years, we have chosen not to include Santa Claus in our Christmas stories and decorations. There are several reasons.

First, fairy tales are fun and we enjoy them, but we don't ask our children to believe them.

Second, we want our children to understand God as fully as they're able at whatever age they are. So we try to avoid anything that would delay or distort that understanding. It seems to us that celebrating with a mixture of Santa and manger will postpone a child's clear understanding of what the real truth of God is. It's very difficult for a young child to pick through a marble cake of part-truth and part-imagination to find the crumbs of reality.

Third, we think about how confusing it must be to a straight-thinking, uncritically-minded preschooler because Santa is so much like what we're trying all year to teach our children about God. Look, for example, at the "attributes" of Santa.

He's omniscient—he sees everything you do.
He rewards you if you're good.
He's omnipresent—at least, he can be everywhere in one night.
He gives you good gifts.
He's the most famous "old man in the sky" figure.
But at the deeper level that young children haven't reached yet in their understanding, he is not like God at all.

For example, does Santa really care if we're bad or good? Think of the most awful kid you can remember. Did he or she ever not get gifts from Santa?

What about Santa's spying and then rewarding you if you're good enough? That's not the way God operates. He gave us his gift—his Son—even though we weren't good at all. "God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8). He gave his gift to us to make us good, not because we had proved ourselves good enough.

Helping our children understand God as much as they're able at whatever age they are is our primary goal. But we've also seen some other encouraging effects of not including Santa in our celebration.

First, I think children are glad to realize that their parents, who live with them all year and know all the worst things about them, still show their love at Christmas. Isn't that more significant than a funny, old, make-believe man who drops in just once a year?

Second, I think most children know their family's usual giving patterns for birthday and special events. They tend to have an instinct about their family's typical spending levels and abilities. Knowing that their Christmas gifts come from the people they love, rather than from a bottomless sack, can help diminish the "I-want-this, give-me-that" syndrome.

And finally, when children know that God's generosity is reflected by God's people, it tends to encourage a sense of responsibility about helping make Christmas good for others.

Karsten, for example, worked hard on one gift in 1975. On that Christmas morning, his daddy stepped around a large, loose-flapped cardboard box to get to his chair at the breakfast table. "Where's Karsten?" he asked, expecting to see our excited three-year-old raring to leap into the day. Sitting down, I said, "He'll be here in a minute."

I nudged the box with my toe. From inside the carton, Karsten threw back the flaps and sprang to his full three-foot stature. "And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them . . ." He had memorized Luke 2:8-20 as a gift for his dad. Karsten knew the real story.

In fact, a few days later, he and I were walking down the hall at the church we attended then. One of the older ladies leaned down to squeeze his pink, round cheek and asked, "What did Santa bring you?" Karsten's head jerked quickly toward me, and he whispered loudly, "Doesn't she know?"

The Downside of Always Telling Kids to Work Harder

Interesting article in various respects--existing, parenting, Chinese culture....

It's called "The Downside of Always Telling Kids to Work Harder"

The early years

The following is the conclusion to the most recent blog post on Desiring God, which discusses Joseph and Mary's early years as a family:

"The Holy Family's first few years were not tranquil. They were filled

with grueling travel during the hardest part of pregnancy, a birth in

worse than a barn, no steady income, an assassination attempt, two dessert

crossings on foot with an infant, living in a foreign country, waiting on

God for guidance and provisions just in the nick of time. It was

difficult, expensive, time-consuming, career-delaying and full of

uncertainty.

And it was God's will.

The unplanned, inefficient detours of our lives are planned by God. They

are common for disciples, and they commonly don't make sense in the

moment. But God's ways are not our ways because our lives are about him,

not about us. He is orchestrating far more than we know in every

unexpected event and delay.

So when you find yourself suddenly moving in a direction you had not

planned, take heart, hold tight, and trust God's navigation."

The Measure of Whether We Understand the Gospel (in the heart)

Those of us from a Christianized culture have heard the gospel many, many times. Church attenders sometimes get used to hearing it, as if we could grow beyond it. This leads us to assume the gospel---a deadly, deadly error.

This creates the need for a way to measure, in ourselves, whether we genuinely embrace the gospel, not merely in our heads, but from the heart. If we fully embrace the gospel, we shall find ourselves gladly applying the following verses to ourselves. (I suspect most of us are good at only applying ONE of them at a time)

1. "You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased." (Mk 1:11;Luke 3:22). According to John 17:23, this verse applies to us as much as to Jesus since Jesus himself said, "John 17:23 I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me. " [God loves us the same way He loves Jesus!]

2. "... Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost." (1 Tim 1:15; cp Eph. 3:8, "To me, though I am the very least of all the saints, this grace was given....)

I struggle accepting the first one. I am the worst sinner I know because I am more familiar with my sin than anyone else's. Which do you more often struggle to accept?

Makaria's stocking

Do I know how to sew? Nope, not at all. But I realized that I didn't have a stocking for Makaria yet, so my gears started turning. "I could make a stocking. That seems easy enough."

One of my goals in life is to do things as cheaply and frugally as possible. The only thing I had to buy was more thread once my red ran out.

I cut out an old towel for the filler. And then used old sheets for the red and green. Then, I just started sewing. I really didn't know where I was going with it.




I like how it turned out. I wanted to keep the 'homemade' look to it. And it was a good thing because I didn't know how to fix the little imperfections anyway.



'Joi' is Makaria's middle name and also an important word of worship during Christmas. I was laughing at myself at how ghetto my process was for making this. I have dreams of being a stellar seamstress one day, following in my Grandmother's footsteps. Stellar I am not. My brain usually comes up with things that I have no skill at all for doing (that's a life issue for me). But it was fun and I'm pleased with the outcome.




I wouldn't say the process was easy, but it was really fun. I've discovered about myself that I have to have some type of creative outlet or I start getting antsy. So this was it for the last couple of days.

A Little Family Christmas Cheer

I LOVE Christmas! And honestly, I love celebrating Christmas outside of America. Why? Because we get to avoid the commercial nonsense that comes along with this season. Although we do have to endure Santa's face that is now popping up everywhere. There is not even a concept here that Christmas is about anything BUT Santa. Stupid Santa Claus. (We obviously don't do the Santa thing. We told our kids that it's like telling them that we're having a birthday party for them and then when everyone shows up, we celebrate Dora the Explorer instead. We don't celebrate their birthday at all, but instead celebrate some random person, just because they are nice and cute. Christmas is about Jesus and that's it. Ok, finished now.)

We've got several family traditions that are getting more and more fun as our kids get older. I thought I'd share just a few.




Every year, we take 25 of the "50 Reasons Jesus Came to Die" or the "Passion of the Christ" by John Piper and we talk about one every night. Our friends were laughing the other night, because one of our first ones was "to absorb the wrath of God." As heavy as this sounds, it's important that our kids understand the full breadth of this holiday. It's not just about cute babies, fluffy sheep and tamed camels. It's about Jesus and His purpose and His redemption. Anyway, after each night, we put the reason on an ornament and hang it here on our little tree. Our other tree is wedged between the ceiling and window. Literally wedged. But it's a cute little guy.



We made some carolers out of toilet paper rolls. The kids had a blast making them. And we got to find a use for all the unmatched kid's socks that creep around on our floors.


The kid's kindergarten was canceled this week because "we've got stuff to do." That was the reason given to us. We've learned just not to ask why. So, an impromptu nativity scene was in order. Makaria, being the youngest (note, I did not say smallest) was nominated to be Jesus.

Kesed was the one socked, pantless shepherd that got the memo a little late. The other shepherds and wise men have beaten him to the manger.





I think Jesus is doing a little somethin' somethin' in his diaper while unsuspecting Mary, Joseph and the gang are busy praying and worshipping their Lord.








I love this one, because I totally think Mary would have played peek-a-boo with Jesus.



I'm sure this is the first of several Christmas blogs. But for now, I'm going to finish making a stocking.

The Gospel and Sex Education

When should we start talking about sex with our kids?

Well, when do they start singing Christmas carols? Have you noticed how often they refer to the miracle of the virgin birth? It's in every other song. It was God's fulfilment of prophecy. It was a public sign authenticating Jesus' identity. This is the incarnation's beginning.

Therefore, do not let these words pass through your ears or your kids ears without some instruction on the matter. While you don't have to begin an anatomy lesson, let's think about what you can say that doesn't get more biological than they can retain.

For example, a few Christmases ago, we explained what a virgin was, "Someone who can't have kids". This is completely true. A virgin cannot birth children. If A, then not B. Therefore, we can show our kids the miracle of Christmas....of the incarnation.

Don't let squeamishness about sex take away from one of the central pieces of the Christmas story.

Omodo

This is a true life conversation that is deeply challenging and presses us to reflect on the heart of contextualization:

Omodo (by Walter A. Trobisch)

On one of my trips I worshipped in an African church where nobody knew me. After the service I talked to two boys who had also attended.

"How many brother and sisters do you have?" I asked the first one.

"Three."

"Are they all from the same stomach?"

"Yes, my father is a Christian."

"How about you?" I addressed the other boy.

He hesitated. In his mind he was adding up. I knew immediately that he came from a polygamous family.

"We are nine," he finally said.

"Is your father a Christian?"

"No," was the typical answer, "he is a polygamist."

"Are you baptised?"

"Yes, and my brothers and sister too," he added proudly.

"And their mothers?"

"They are all three baptised, but only the first wife takes communion."

"Take me to your father."

The boy led me to a compound with many individual houses. It breathed an atmosphere of cleanliness, order and wealth. Each wife had her own house and her own kitchen. The father, a middle-aged, good-looking man, tall, fat and impressive, received me without embarrassment and with apparent joy. I found Omodo, as we shall call him, a well-educated person, wide awake and intelligent, with a sharp wit and a rare sense of humor. From the outset he made no apologies for being a polygamist, he was proud of it. Let me try to put down here the essential content of our conversation that day which lasted for several hours.

"Welcome to the hut of a poor sinner!" The words were accompanied by good-hearted laughter.

"It looks like a rich sinner," I retorted.

"The saints come very seldom to this place," he said, "they don't want to be contaminated with sin."

"But they are not afraid to receive your wives and children. I just met them in church."

"I know. I give everyone a coin for the collection plate. I guess I finance half of the church's budget. They are glad to take my money, but they don't want me."

I sat in thoughtful silence. After a while he continued, "I feel sorry for the pastor. By refusing to accept all the polygamous men in town as church members he has made his flock poor and they shall always be dependent upon subsidies from America. He has created a church of women whom he tells every Sunday that polygamy is wrong."

"Wasn't your first wife heart-broken when you took a second one?"

Omodo looked at me almost with pity. "It was her happiest day," he said finally.

"Tell me how it happened."

"Well, one day after she had come home from the garden and had fetched wood and water, she was preparing the evening meal, while I sat in front of my house and watched her. Suddenly she turned to me and mocked me. She called me a 'poor man,' because I had only one wife. She pointed to our neighbor's wife who could care for her children while the other wife prepared the food."

"Poor man," Omodo repeated. "I can take much, but not that. I had to admit that she was right. She needed help. She had already picked out a second wife for me and they get along fine."

I glanced around the courtyard and saw a beautiful young woman, about 19 or 20, come out of one of the huts.

"It was a sacrifice for me," Omodo commented. "Her father demanded a very high bride price."

"Do you mean that the wife, who caused you to become a polygamist is the only one of your family who receives communion?"

"Yes, she told the missionary how hard it was for her to share her love for me with another woman. According to the church my wives are considered sinless because each of them has only one husband. I, the father, am the only sinner in our family. Since the Lord's supper is not given to sinners, I am excluded from it. Do you understand that, pastor?"

I was entirely confused.

"And you see," Omodo continued, "they are all praying for me that I might be saved from sin, but they don't agree from which sin I will be saved."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, the pastor prays that I may not continue to commit the sin of polygamy. My wives pray that I may not commit the sin of divorce. I wonder whose prayers are heard first."

"So your wives are afraid that you become a Christian?"

"They are afraid that I become a church member. Let's put it that way. For me there is a difference. You see they can only have intimate relations with me as long as I do not belong to the church. In the moment I would become a church member their marriage relations with me would become sinful."

"Wouldn't you like to become a church member?"

"Pastor, don't lead me into temptation! How can I become a church member, if it means to disobey Christ? Christ forbade divorce, but not polygamy. The church forbids polygamy but demands divorce. How can I become a church member, if I want to be a Christian? For me there is only one way, to be a Christian without the church."

"Have you ever talked to your pastor about that?"

"He does not dare to talk to me, because he knows as well as I do that some of his elders have a second wife secretly. The only difference between them and me is that I am honest and they are hypocrites."

"Did a missionary ever talk to you?"

"Yes, once. I told him that with the high divorce rate in Europe, they have only a successive form of polygamy while we have a simultaneous polygamy. That did it. He never came back."

I was speechless. Omodo accompanied me back to the village. He evidently enjoyed to be seen with a pastor.

"But tell me, why did you take a third wife?" I asked him.

"I did not take her. I inherited her from my late brother, including her children. Actually my older brother would have been next in line. But he is an elder. He is not allowed to sin by giving security to a widow."

I looked in his eyes. "Do you want to become a Christian?"

"I am a Christian." Omodo said without smiling.

As I walked slowly down the path, the verse came to my mind: "You blind guides, straining out a gnat and swallowing a camel."

What does it mean to take responsibility as a congregation for Omodo? I am sorry that I was not able to see Omodo again, because I had met him while I was on a trip. I just report to you the essence of our conversation because it contains in a nutshell the main attitudes of polygamists toward the church. It is always healthy to see ourselves with the eyes of an outsider.

I asked myself: What would I have done if I were pastor in Omodo's town?


From Walter A. Trobisch, "Congregational Responsibility for the Christian Individual," in Readings in Missionary Anthropology II, ed. William A. Smalley (South Pasadena: William Carey Library, 1978), pp. 233-235.

Love-based Repentance

“In fear-based repentance, we don’t learn to hate the sin for itself, and it doesn’t lose its attractive power. We learn only to refrain from it for our own sake. But when we rejoice over God’s sacrificial, suffering love for us – seeing what it cost him to save us from sin – we learn to hate the sin for what it is. We see what the sin cost God. What most assures us of God’s unconditional love (Jesus’s costly death) is what most convicts us of the evil of sin. Fear-based repentance makes us hate ourselves. Joy-based repentance makes us hate the sin.”

- Timothy Keller, Counterfeit Gods (New York, NY: Penguin Group, 2009), 172.