Wednesday, October 04, 2017

How Obligation can be a Generosity Thing

***I'm guest blogging today over at JacksonWu.org. ***


I've been thinking on the concept of obligation for a few months now. For most of us Americans the idea of being obligated to someone makes us want to flash mob Times Square while singing, "You Don't Own Me."

But since moving to China in 2003 I've learned that obligation doesn't bind me with shackles, it binds me with mutual generosity.

Go over there and tell me what you think. It's not an easy pill to swallow, trust me. The night my now husband and I had the "Determine The Relationship," talk, I quickly responded with, "Just because we are dating now, don't think that means I want to see you everyday."

I get it, friends. I totally get the panic that can come with being obligated.

And with that, I appropriately leave you the last chorus of Lesley Gore's song:


I don't tell you what to say
I don't tell you what to do
So just let me be myself
That's all I ask of you
I'm young and I love to be young
I'm free and I love to be free
To live my life the way I want
To say and do whatever I please
And don't tell me what to do
Oh,
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