Some time away

We had some time away last week. Here's some pictures. You know you're in a beautiful spot when you feel like doing lots of
photo editing would ruin the picture.

A Referral!

So this is exciting and a little anti-climatic because we can't show a picture or share a name yet because of Ethiopian law. But...WE GOT OUR REFERRAL!!!!

We turned our paperwork and the next morning, she was sitting in our inbox. Ya, I know, that sounds weird. But we weren't at all expecting it so soon, so it kinda felt like we just found out we were having an accidental pregnancy. Our stuff is in the translation process and hopefully we'll get her this summer. Once I get the green light, we'll post pictures and her name and all that fun stuff.

All I know is that she's a fatty. We call her our chunky monkey. It's ironic because all my naturally born babies are little peanuts.

Thanks for the prayers guys! We'll keep you posted.

Discerning God's Will

Here’s a good rule to discerning God’s will:

 

“You will know what to do

When Christ is a greater joy to you

Than any place you want to be

Or success you hope to see.”

Lessons We're Learning: The difference betweem results and reasons

For the past few months, we’ve been meditating heavily on the connection between joy, love, the cross, and faith. As full-blown Christian hedonists, we well know that our joy in Christ overflows into love for others. However, we recently discovered how we have misused this wonderful truth.

 

It dawned on me that I have so striven to be a good parent and love people that I have been using love or joy in God as a means rather than the only end goal. In other words, as I’ve sought to love my kids or other people more, I’ve gone to the Bible seeking my satisfaction in Christ (rather than convenience, internet, books, etc.) SO THAT I could then be a better parent, spouse, worker, etc…. THIS IS THE PROBLEM!

 

We can never use joy in Christ as a means, for it is the ultimate end of our existence. There is no greater prize. No greater reward. Being a good parent, spouse, worker, etc does not satisfy as Christ does. His happiness is better and forever. In effect, I have been pursuing the fruit of the Spirit as if they were the consummation of our joy, all the while missing the fact that the only reason these are desirable is because they reflect Christ’s own nature.

 

How does this practically affect love? We were reminded by John Piper’s Desiring God that the motive for loving people is because God promises us reward. This was the way Christ constantly motivated people, BUT this is not being a mercenary. This is because God is our reward. He alone is the proper aim of all our efforts. Therefore, loving people, displaying patience, etc are all means and opportunities to know and enjoy Christ, particularly as His grace and power move in us. Therefore, even when we don’t feel affection for a person, our ambition to savor Christ propels us to loving acts; these are actually faith steps that God will be satisfying when we obey; then, we see that he reveals Himself to us, changing us more into the likeness of Christ, thereby increasing our capacity for joy. This is the essence of sanctification—the increase capacity for enjoying Christ. [Far too many books only speak of sanctification in term of loving actions]

 

The true Christian cannot be satisfied with merely seeing Christ; (s)he feels the compulsion and drive to be like Him and experience Him within us. Therefore, when Christ is our ultimate final joy (and not a means), then love does come [but as a result, not the final goal]. This epiphany has taught us the subtly of sin and the difference between a reason and a result. When we say “so that” in English, we may sometimes either refer to a result or to the purpose of an action. When we say, “Find your satisfaction in Christ so that your love may abound,” we need to be clear we are talking about the result of joy, not its purpose. This makes all the difference in finding lasting and final joy in life—in Christ alone.

arbitrary parent rules and a little update

Here are two recently said to our 3 year old, Charis:

1. "Charis, you cannot put dominoes down your pants."

That one sounds like it can also be said in many nursing homes.

2. "Charis, you cannot go to the poop on the trashcan anymore."


Here's the adoption update:

We've submitted our paperwork and are working out logistics for the next phase. We've got a couple of visa issues posing problems. If we can get those worked out, we might be able to get our baby sooner than we thought!!

We'll keep you posted.

When They're Older?

We hear a lot of people ask us about having 4 young kids living overseas. We also hear many people say they think it best to wait a little bit until their kids get older to move overseas. It doesn’t make sense to them to move when the kids are small. Aside from our own experience, we know a lot of families who live overseas. Without exception, we have found that logic (“Wait until the kids are older”) to be completely opposite. In fact, we again and again see the following pattern: the older the kids, the more difficult the transition.

 

All transitions are challenging, for sure. However, when kids are young, they are more flexible and adapt quickly, learning language and culture easily and naturally. The new country become home. That is what is “normal”. It’s older kids who have already planted a lot of roots in American culture, who have more challenges adjusting to new language and loss of friends. Of course, people do it all the time. If we’re honest, we parents tend to put onto our kids our own pains and fears. WE don’t want to miss what we’re used to. WE will miss coaching the baseball team or going to the same activities we did growing up. Our kids won’t miss them…they’ll have a whole new series of wonderful experiences which they will treasure. They won’t miss our experiences.

 

OUR point is this: Families, don’t hesitate to move overseas!

 

The truth is, according to standard thinking, there is never a logical time to move overseas. There’s always some reason to stay…money, career, job, friends, family… There is much joy waiting those who leave these precious things to experience the intentional, fruitful, diverse experience of overseas life. What a gift to kids and adult a like. If you are considering moving overseas as a family, begin the process today. Don’t wait! We love you and hope to see you soon.

Actually, everyday's a circus

It was our last day of Circus studies for Malachi's home school. Here's a few pictures from the occasion. We had a friend come over while we were getting ready, so she got to join in on the fun. Have I said yet, that I love home school? Cause I do. Charis' make-up was self evolving after she got hold of the markers.

Malachi's 5th

We celebrated Malachi's 5th Birthday last night!! Wow, time flies.

He loves math, reading, green pea ice cream, pizza, seaweed and garlic salad, green beans, climbing trees, corn ice cream, playing with brother and sisters, going to school, transformers, wrestling and lots more. He's pretty much into all things boy. He's a wonderful big brother and is really excited for the new baby to come, because "I want to see her skin."




We went downtown to have some pizza and celebrate.



Selah has learned this instrument at school and Malachi has fallen in love with it. So we got him one for his birthday. You have to blow in it in order for it to play. He's always hearing a beat and has picked it up really quickly.






Selah wrote him a story about Transformers. It was really cute.







Selah is yelling at him "SAY POOP!" in this picture...hence his expression. I don't know if he's reacting to her words or to the fact that he's allowed to say the word 'poop'.

We had a great time celebrating with our little buddy! We're going to do a little more celebrating in a few weeks with some friends. But we always do our family celebration and dinner on the date of their birthday.

Happy Birthday and we love you!!

The (Twisted) Anatomy of Amercian Evangelism

Have you ever thought of the contemporary American "style" of evangelism?

Basically, the main goal that people have in conversation tends to be to GET THEM TO CHURCH. We'll feel like we've done our job if we at least get them thinking about going to a church. Besides the fact that this encourages a "religious" or institution mentality, it doesn't get people to Jesus.

It is assumed that the church will give them Jesus (You know what happens when as assume?) However, so many churches these days are more focused on "seekers", on performance, and very general and light messages that again no one hears much about Jesus. Church might heighten someone's sense of conscience, but struggles ot preach the gospel. If people were actually to talk about the essentials of the gospel (sin, judgment, genuine faith means obedience, Christ is the ONLY way to the Father...), tons of people wouldn't come to church.

It is assumed people will hear the gospel in a small group (IF THEY JOIN ONE...another assumption). Then we return to the cycle of people not personally sharing the gospel. After all, it is assumed if you're in a small group that you might be a Christian. Perhaps, they claim to be so. THEN, it's awkward to challenge that profession despite their contrary life and understanding.

If we would be more intentional to personally share the good news rather than passing the buck to some sermon, we could break this cycle and see people know Jesus. I plead: Let us not be ashamed of the gospel.

A good recent book is Mark Dever's "The Gospel & Personal Evangelism".

The rest of the show

These are the outfits that I'm glad my children were not subjected to.





Actually, this one's cute. I added it because I loved this little guy.





This is a BOY...




and this one too.

New Years Performance 2009

So, the kids had their annual New Years performance on Friday. As many of you know, that usually brings an interesting post and many black mail photos. This year was actually pretty tame. My only hope was that Malachi would actually wear more than his underwear this time. Here's Charis and Malachi getting ready.



I had to use a little ice cream bribe, but she eventually up there on stage. Her entire class was crying the entire time.



Malachi, all ready to go.







Charis' class was so cute. They jumped up and down and shook those shiny things on their wrists. Charis jumped and jumped and jumped. She was fantastic!




Malachi had a kong fu performance. He calls it "Hiya" because they kick, punch and say 'hiya' the whole time. It was a great show and he did awesome. At the end was a Tai Chi wind down.




He had one costume change and ended the show with a tribute to the Sichuan earthquake victims. He and his classmates sang their little hearts out. I was really proud of both of our kids.

"The Roots of Endurance"

Paragraph 3 of this book and I had to stop and blog already.  

"There is a mind-set in the prosperous West that we deserve pain-free, trouble-free existence.  When life deals us the opposite, we have a right not only to blame somebody or some system and to feel sorry for ourselves, but also to devote most of our time to coping, so that we have no time or energy left over for serving others."   

"This mind-set gives a trajectory to a life that is almost universal-namely, away from stress and toward comfort and safety and relief.  Then churches grow up in this mind-set, and it never occurs to anyone in such a community of believers that choosing discomfort, stress, and danger might be the right thing-even the normal, biblical thing-to do."

I have lived for so long in the idea that I DESERVE comfort and safety.  The problem with that, is that you just don't see the faithful people in Scripture living that kind of life.  If I want to see a BIG God, I have to be willing to put away my small ideas about Him and step out into discomfort and worldly insecurity.  And instead see my comfort and safety in any given day as a momentary Grace.

All I Want for Christmas...

I have about 200 pictures of my sister's trip with us. I'll post a few now and some more later. She stayed about 2 weeks at our place and just kind of meshed into our daily routine.



We went to a German, Chinese, Brazilian BBQ place for Christmas Eve dinner. We had the traditional Christmas Eve fare: garlic chicken hearts, broiled fish-head included, garlic pickled pork belly. Ya know, all the classics. And who doesn't have a young Chinese guy dressed as a cowboy and outfitted with a medical mask at their party?!



We had a blast with Carrie's sister and her 8 month old, Grae. Grae had all the old ladies cooing when they saw her. They all said she was SO white and SO fat. So for the rest of the time, her Chinese name was "white and fat." I taught my sis how to knit; she met with lots of our friends; we went to parks; made and distributed cookies, cards and gifts; hung out; prayed and drank too much coffee. It was a wonderful balance of hang out time, rest and getting to know China. At the end of her trip, Carrie, Kim and Grae met up with Kim's in-laws in Beijing. We walked around a more traditional area and took tons of pictures. I'll post those another time. My sister's an incredible photographer, so it was really fun for me to get to take pictures alongside her.



This is a frozen lake. People and sheep were skating, sledding, riding and walking all over.



Here's Kim and her mother-in-law eating some local snacks. It was a beautiful day to be outside and enjoy the Beijing smog.







A guy changing some electrical wiring. Who needs ladders really?!





Kesed and his new best friend, Grae. The two of them got along really well, it was really cute.



Having her here was so much fun. She is such a blessing to me, my family and now to our friends here in the city. I've cried now, multiple times. She was here for about 2 1/2 weeks, which was just long enough to make it feel like she was supposed to be living here with us. She was a wonderful minister and friend to all of us. So until next time....We Love You!

A "Personal Relationship" With Jesus

The Apostle John obviously had a very close, personal relationship with John. He was the disciple whom Jesus loved who laid on Jesus' chest at the Lord's supper, one of the three closest disciples. This language of having "personal relationship" with Jesus is the centerpiece of modern evangelicalism. Notice what happens in Revelation 1:17, when John sees Jesus:

"When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead."

Having a "personal relationship" with Jesus is no casual matter that is in anyway conducive to habit, trivialities, or apathy. To fall on our faces as though dead means we're doing something far more weighty and pregnant with meaning than catching up on to-dos, blog and email, or watching the latest news report or TV episode, or whatever other seemingly important thing we have to do each day.

We're compelled to ask ourselves, "Do I [practically speaking] regard my 'personal relationship with Jesus' with this sort of trembling and single mindedness?"

America: The Most Dangerous Place to Raise a Child

We have heard so many times that it's dangerous to raise our kids overseas, or that it's a disservice to them to rob them of America. In some form or fashion, people often say this to us.

Luke 8:14 counters this idea: "And as for what fell among the thorns, they are those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by the cares and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature."

It is far more dangerous for our kids to live amid the laxity, entertainment, addiction to comfort, apathy, affluency, and gluttony of America than here or anywhere else. These things may rob them of their souls. By contrast, the most dangerous places in the world or merely those that lack America's conveniences all offer our kids the life-giving chance to see what really matters, to live intentionally, as foreigners in the world....

As parents, we need to examine what we really think is dangerous...criticism, weapons, automobiles, cancers.... OR "the cares and riches and pleasures of life"? Do we merely care for their bodies and momentary happiness OR their entire lives, including their souls and their eternal joy? This distinction will radically affect how we parent, where we spend our money, where we live, what we eat, who we meet, what we watch and listen to, the risks we will take, and the sufferings we will embrace with gladness.

Penn Tells His Thoughts of Proselytizing

You gotta check out this clip posted Penn (of Penn and Teller) about strangers who tell other people about Jesus. He is an atheist. His words may catch you off guard. This is a must see.

Merry Christmas

Psalm 16:11

"You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy, at your right hand are pleasures forevermore."

Merry Christmas to everyone!

We promise to post soon. We've been enjoying time with Carrie's sister, so computer time has been slim.

thanksgiving

We had a great Thanksgiving. We actually spent the day of Thanksgiving in interviews for the adoption. What a great way to celebrate! Some of our friends graciously invited us to join them on Sunday for a big Thanksgiving meal. We've got some teachers in other parts of the city, but they all came together for the dinner. It was wonderful! We got to meet lots of new people and eat some great food.





Here's the gang with tables set up in the hallway of their dorms.



Charis spent the first hour like this. She doesn't like white people. No joke. So she was scared of everyone....except for the one black teacher we have in the city. Charis likes her. After an hour, she took her coat off and we coaxed her to sit with Brad and I.




Kesed spent his dinner being fed by a friend. They sat and talked and played and ate. It was funny because about 30 minutes after eating, I see our friend holding Kesed by his thighs and waiting. He finally asked me how Kesed was going to go to the bathroom, because he had normal pants on (no split pants). I told him that he had on a diaper. I explained that he didn't need to hold him up (right next to the dinner table, by the way) waiting for Kesed to go to the bathroom. This is the way all Chinese parents do it, I just forgot to tell our friend Kesed had a diaper on. It was funny.



Malachi spent his after dinner hours at a dance party. He was in the center the ENTIRE time. He actually had some good moves. This kid cannot stand being still if there is a beat to be heard. It's so funny to watch his shoulders start moving. Then the head gets going. It's as if he's going to bust out of his skin if he doesn't dance.






Here's Selah playing guitar with a friend. They were singing "Great is Thy Faithfulness when I walked in. She loves playing any type of instrument. We had a blast.

A new winner!

So I have been dethroned.  I am sitting in the airport and just got done reading a little article on the rise of plastic surgery....to the DEAD!  Face lifts, botox injections, tummy tucks, and whatever they will pay for.

Congratulations to all the men and women who have now taken the crown of Mr./Ms. Pathetic.

I hope they feel good about the fact that they spent thousands of dollars to look good as they lay under a patch of dirt and cow manure.  Way to go.  I'm sure the hungry, hurting and homeless can wait.   UGH....

People.         Sometimes, I'm not sure why God keeps us around.

Officially crowned... Ms. Pathetic

I, Carrie, have been gone for a couple of days.  I'm in a large city down south and it has caused me much culture shock.  But that's not the point.  I'm writing to confess that I could not possibly get more pathetic.  I have officially lost it on two separate forms of transportation in the last two days.  

Pathetic Encounter #1

I was on the airplane and reading "A Thousand Splendid Suns".  It's by the same guy who wrote "Kite Runner".  Both are intense... good, but really intense.  So I'm about halfway through and there's a situation with an orphanage.  ***Little Spoiler***  A mom has to drop off her 7 year old little girl at an orphanage in Afghanistan because the family has no food and the country is in war. So of course the author goes into this vivid explanation of the drop off.  The facial expressions, the dust swirling in the air, the unspoken fears....it was relentless, really.  Well, anyway, I just lost it.  Right there on the airplane.  And it wasn't the calm little dab your eyes on your sleeve kind of cry.  It was a sucking on a vacuum cleaner kind of cry.  So I faced the window and stared at the pollution as we landed.

Pathetic Encounter #3

Tonight, I walked through the streets for a little bit, taking pictures and just relaxing.  My introverted side needed some picture taking and people watching.  I'm listening to Christmas music as I'm walking the streets and watching cell phones replace the laughter of their child in the stroller.  I'm watching Christmas sales and lines around the corner to buy expensive jewelry.  I'm standing backwards in the subway and it was as if I was the only person standing still while people and things flew past me at warp speed.  "God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman" was playing as I was watching lifeless, oblivious people and things fly passed me into the background of Christmas.  As I was weeping, my heart broke for the confusion over this holiday.  As believers, we HAVE to celebrate differently than this world.  We have reason to celebrate.  We are not to remain in a state of dismay and confusion, especially during Christmas.  

Christ came, revealed himself to the prominent and to the lowly.  I pray that the Lord would allow me to remain somberly joyful this Christmas.  And thank you Lord, for the gift of tears....even if it is pretty darn pathetic :)

God Loves a Cheerful Giver

“God loves a cheerful giver” (this includes our time)

John Owen's Indwelling Sin

Wow! If you want to slay the incessant desires that wage war against your soul and thus pilfer joy, John Owen’s Indwelling Sin is a classic worth slowly chewing on. It is too dense in content for a fast read, however, if you would commit a few minutes a day to meditating on a few pages or paragraphs, greater victories will doubtless be gained.

Enjoy the following encouragement from Owen’s book, “Never let us reckon that our work in contending against sin, in crucifying, mortifying, and subduing of it, is at an end…Many conquerors have been ruined by their carelessness after a victory, and many have been spiritually wounded after great successes against this enemy…he who dies fighting in this warfare dies assuredly a conqueror.”

Justin Taylor has a great edition of John Owen’s most famous works on sin, entitled, Overcoming Sin and Temptation.

Weary of God

Just read a tough word in Isaiah 43:22, "Yet you did not call upon me, O Jacob, but you have been weary of me, O Israel." We all know weariness; applying that to God, our sin looks even more deplorable!

All sin is becoming weary or tired of God. A good question to ask ourselves is simply this, "Where and when am I weary of God?"

Not "if"...since we all sin. Why do we grow weary? From this perspective, we have a different way to approach our prayer time, Scripture study, worship, service, and life in general....what do you do to not grow weary in a day and throughout the day? In the words of George Mueller, our duty evey morning and all day is to make sure we are "happy [i.e. overflowing in joy] in God", otherwise, we are useless at the breakfast table or anywhere else.

Thank God

If you want to grow in your knowledge of the Father, read Paul and Jesus' various prayers of thanksgivings. We only thank people when they did actually did something. So, whenever we read "I thank God that...", we know that God actually did... otherwise, there would be no need for thanksgiving. Right?

With that said, check out this little jewel in 1 Thessalonians 2:13, "And we also thank God constantly for this, that when you received the word of God, which you heard from us, you accepted it not as the word of men but as what it really is, the word of God, which is at work in you believers." Notice what Paul says God did---God made them accept the gospel (cp. 2:5, 8, 9; 1:5), the word of God, as the word of God! 

Most people think God offers the word of God but we are the ones who finally decide to accept it or not. But when you actually read the Bible, notice what it says. This is yet another example of sovereign grace! May we constantly thank God for the grace he gave us to accept the gospel at all. We contributed nothing to salvation but our sin!!

My little make-up artist

After rest time the other day, Charis emerged looking ready for a night on the town. Not sure which town exactly, but a town of very shady proportions. Sorry for the eye thing, but I wanted you to see that Selah also drew a watch on one hand and a bracelet on the other.




So if you're short on make-up, any markers will do.